I got the call. Technically my beta is positive. But, congruent with my disappearing line on the HTPs, the number is an impressively low 11.8. I have to keep doing the PIO and Estrogen patches and go back Friday for confirmation of the decreasing beta. I knew this number wasn’t good but I asked my nurse – who was the one who called me – if numbers like this ever worked out for the positive. She said in her experience she would guess it’s less than 5% chances that we could have a positive outcome. I might have had more hope for this miracle if I hadn’t seen the positive and then negative HPTs. I know it’s a chemical.
In the face of another soul-crushing heartbreak, I’m trying to find the silver lining. At least we know right away and were not tricked by a good first beta like my last FET induced chemical pregnancy in 2012.
That leaves the score at 2 BFNs, 2 chemical pregnancies, 2 “miscarriages” and 3 baby’s lost. Who ever thought it would be this hard?
Just Another Infertility Blog 
Brutal. I’m really sorry. It was a good thought to try the FET, and I hope that if you decide to move forward with a fresh cycle there is (finally) a baby that comes home with you.
Thank you. Yes, it was the right choice, even if it doesn’t work out.
My heart just broke for you. I hate that you are experiencing yet another heartbreaking loss. I wish there was some way I could take all your pain away, but I know there is just nothing I can say or do that will make a difference. Please know that I am thinking about you and sending love your way.
thank you for these kind words, they’re much appreciated.
Oh dear, I’m so very sorry. I wish I knew the right words… I’ll be praying for you.
thank you.
Oh gosh. This is so unfair for you. I’m so terribly sorry that you’ve had to go through all this, you certainly do not deserve it. That absolutely sucks. I’m still keeping my fingers crossed for you though!
Thank you. Good luck over these next weeks and months.
Thank you 🙂
I’m really sorry. Thinking of you.
Thank you. Looks like you fell off my reader somehow – I just added you back.
This is so crap.
Sending you the biggest hug xxx
Thank you.
Sorry 😦 it never gets easier!
thank you. For me the sad truth is that is actually does get easier in one way but also darkly harder in others.
This royally sucks! I’m so sorry. Praying for a miracle!
thank you.
I am so sorry. This is heartbreaking and soul-crushing. If there is anything I can do, please… I am just so sad and lost for you.
my dear sweet friend, thank you. But please don’t waste your energy on me. You have your own baby (or two ;-)) to worry about. I will be pregnant vicariously through you.
Don’t say that! You are never a waste of energy. My heart hurts for you, it’s inevitable.
I completely feel your pain! And it’s the worst… I haven’t suffered as many losses as you have and I’m very sorry for that. But I have had 2 miscarriages and had a fresh embryo transfer in October and got my beta results about a week and a half ago. After getting a positive at home my beta was 12 , so my hopes were not high. And after a long excruciating weekend I had my repeat beta done and it was 4. Which was consider negative. We are schedule for a FET in December. I wish you the best of luck and will keep you in my thoughts! Your not alone as much as it may feel like that sometimes! Thank you for making me remember that also!
I’m sorry for your difficulty but thank you for the camaraderie. Good luck in December.
I’m so sorry. Hugs.
thank you.
It should never be this hard! I’m so sorry!
thank you. FYI – I watched your announcement video the other day. I was bawling all over myself. Congrats and good luck to you.
I’m so sorry