Technically it’s week 3 now but this story starts in Week 2 so I’m going with it. This post is documenting my miscarriage and will be totally gross TMI. You may want to skip this one… if not, read at your own risk.
Tuesday afternoon (10/22) almost 2 weeks from when I found out the baby’s heart had stopped beating around 3:30pm is when I first saw some spotting. It was more like cervical mucus with small streaks of blood than real blood spotting. And while of course I was expecting it to happen, I wasn’t exactly ready for it and it freaked me out a bit. I was at work and since I didn’t know how long I had until I was bleeding heavily I left as quickly as possible. I didn’t want to be mid-commute during the actual miscarriage. Turns out, I didn’t have to rush. I worked from home Wednesday as a precautionary measure but just continued to spot so I went back to the office for work Thursday. Thursday afternoon I started feeling nauseous and having upset stomach issues. That continued Thursday night and into Friday. I didn’t know if it was miscarriage related or what but I figured better safe than sorry and decided to work from home on Friday as well. Aside from the stomach issues, Friday was pretty uneventful. Saturday afternoon the spotting changed into bleeding but it wasn’t very heavy. By the evening, I was feeling some cramping but it wasn’t too bad. I put on a heavy-duty pad and decided to try to get some sleep.
Early this morning I woke to painful cramping but still wasn’t bleeding much so I went back to bed. I’m not sure how long it was (probably between 30mins to an hour) but I was again awoken by pain at 5am. I went to the toilet but there was still not much blood so I tried to go back to bed again. Within a couple of minutes though I felt it, that first rush of blood. I jumped out of bed and practically ran for the bathroom. Once I knew that the real bleeding had begun I decided to get in the shower. I find a hot shower/bath one of the most comforting places to be and I knew from reading other’s stories that I was going to want to spend a lot of time in the tub.
I got in the tub shortly after 5am. The hot water helped ease the pain and the cramping. I passed a number of clots over the next few hours in the tub. I alternated between running the water in the shower and filling the tub for a bath. Being in the water made clean-up easier and I think it helped it seem like less blood since I didn’t have to keep wiping it away. It was kind of crazy to see the tub water keep turning red with blood though.
There were times this morning when I wanted to get out of the tub but the bleeding was too frequent and heavy. I felt like before I could get out and dry off I’d be bleeding again or passing another clot so it was just easier to stay in the water. At one point I almost threw up. I knew this was a possibility from others who have been down this road before and shared their stories with me. Since it was so early and I hadn’t eaten or had anything to drink since dinner the night before there was nothing in my stomach so I dry heaved a few times but never really threw up. I wished that I had woken my husband because I really wasn’t prepared to spend so much time in the tub. I could really have used a glass of water. And I wish that I had been a bit more prepared and had a container for the clots so I could make sure there was no tissue in the blood.
I managed to semi-sleep for a few periods of time in the water. I finally got out of the tub about 9:45am, about 4 &1/2 hours after I got in. I was very prune-y and was just done being in the water. The bleeding had slowed so I got out of the tub and went back to bed. I had to get up a couple of times when I felt blood coming and then I decided to camp out on the couch since it was closer to the bathroom. While lying on the couch I had more cramping and passed a couple more clots on the toilet. The last time I felt a big clot and had to reach into the toilet to get it. (I know, gross… but by this time I was well past gross). This one was kind of gray and looked different from other clots (it was bigger and pretty solid) so I’m guessing it is placenta tissue. I placed it in a ziplock bag and put it in the fridge. I had asked the nurse on Friday what to do with it since they never told me and I had no idea. Apparently if you can’t bring it in right away they tell you to put it in the fridge. I had been expecting to see a gestational sac or tissue that I would recognize as being more than just blood so I could retain it for testing. But if that last grey-ish thing does not contain the embryo than I must have missed it. I feel bad about that. I didn’t have any plans to bury the embryo, I was planning on turning it over for genetic testing. But the thought that it ended up going down the tub drain or being flushed down the toilet is upsetting.
At this point I think the worst if over. I haven’t had any more cramping or large clots and the bleeding is looking more like normal period bleeding. I know it’s possible that there is still tissue inside and that I may pass more but I think most of it is gone now. I’ll have to call the RE and make an appt. so they can check to make sure it’s gone. I think I’ll give it a few days first. I’d really hate to wait so long and go through all of this just to end up with a D&C anyway.
I feel like there is more to say but my thoughts are not really clear and this is already really long so that’s enough for now. Thank you to everyone for the support and for sharing your stories so I had some frame of reference, it means a lot.